From time to time, the stress of raising an ADHD child caves in on me. Pity. I pity him. I pity me. Grief. For what should have been. What could have been. I don't believe in fairness. It doesn't exist and never was part of the intelligent design. In fact, the opposite of fairness (unfairness?) likely was the main idea in the big plan. That's a post for another day. But, I can't help but wonder what part of the "intelligence" justifies "giftedness" that fills the sails of one childhood with a strong, steady wind but offers another only a restless wind inside a letter box? That's alright. I know the answer. But from time to time, it just caves.
And sometimes, it soars. This week, I was driving Malcolm to school and I threw out a topic, as I manage to do on a good morning. "What if there were no mirrors? Wouldn't that change our whole concept of beauty in the world? What if there were no reflective surfaces?" Malcolm's instant response was: "We'd all die of thirst."
Let me know how long it takes you.
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2 comments:
I'm still trying...maybe I'll get it after this second glass of wine.
But also, I understand. Raising a deaf kid (a deaf kid who hears and talks, no less) evokes similar feelings. What could have been? Sure, he's got honors in reading, but what about that C in writing? Imagine if he had no limitations.
Of course, then, imagine how different we all would be. I am proud of the people he and I have become, not in spite of, but because of how 'different' he is. So many wonderful humans I never would have met, so many important things I never would have learned.
They see the world differently, too, these kids, and the more I live with it, the more I realize what a gift that is. Often a hardship, but surely a gift.
Saw a lovely film last night called Dear Frankie. Kerri, you've probably seen it? It yanked my heart out, the scene in which the boy meets his "dad" for the first time. When I was a kid, I always dreamed of a moment like that. His insight as a deaf young man was humbling.
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